Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Chest Closure

1 year ago today Raygen had her chest closed after her Norwood.

Her chest was open for over a week. During this time she was very sedated and sleeping.

It was so wonderful to see those beautiful eyes again.

Raygen is one tough cookie.

And trust me, she knows it.

It was a few days after her chest was closed that she was finally able to come off the ventilator. It was then that the doctors noticed she was having a hard time breathing and did a scope. It was discovered that both her vocal cords were paralyzed. We were able to move out of the icu and onto the "floor" and Raygen was placed on high flow oxygen. She was able to maintain herself till about May. In May her carbon levels were extremely high and we almost lost her. We were then told that Raygen was going to need a trach or live on the ventilator. So some long sleepless, tearful nights we agreed to the trach. I do believe that if the doctors did not try to "wean" her off her high flow oxygen, and wean her off her pain meds, and consult a lung doc that we could have avoided the trach. I'm trying very hard to let go of my anger towards a few "fellows" but when I think back and remember how she suffered it's really hard to let the past be the past. But now we have our baby. If God told me before hand the path that we would walk with Raygen I would have chosen her anyway. So today I'm celebrating my baby and trying to let go of the past. When the one year anniversaries of things come around it just brings back all those emotions and fears.